What is the best way to deal with hurt?

Sometimes questions are more important than answers. And so, here is mine to you, dear reader: What is the best way to deal with hurt?

There are many kinds of hurt. It can be a simple thing: like a secret that someone you love kept from you; or it can be devastating kinda hurt: like someone broke up with you, fought with you or left you all alone. Hurt is hurt. It doesn’t matter if it was big, or small. It matters how you deal with it.

Let us say that you have just been through a terrible situation which caused you hurt. Call it Event A for sake of ease. This Event A caused you pain, whether largely or minutely doesn’t matter. It was painful, is what is important. Our minds are fragile, our hearts tender. On top of that, everyone is built differently, so one might deal with this strange sort of pain in one way, while his friend might deal with it some other way. Your sibling might resort to one way, while you might be more comfortable using some other method to curb the pain.

So, reader, Bleedster, and my dear friend, WHAT is YOUR personal way to deal with hurt? The methods vary and here are a few of them I know.

One is by revenge. The most popular one that I know.

Revenge is the best medicine, revenge is the best revenge, revenge can help you move on… So many things said about this healer. But does it work?

Let us say you have been through Event A. It caused serious damage in your Almost Perfect World. Your mind swims in agony, betrayal, anger and so many other complex emotions. That clever brain of yours lists the method to cause pain to that person that made Event A happen, and finally concludes that Revenge is the best way to put this situation in the past.

You toy with the idea of Tit for Tat. You scheme, you plan and you prepare. You ignore the poor little conscience you have that is begging you to stop. Of course, REVENGE will make them pay, those Event A doers! And then you carry it out. For some people, seeing the Event A-ers in pain from your Revenge helps. You get your peace, your pain is now theirs, too. And you move on.

But then there are those people, the REALLY GOOD ones. They have never done anything bad in life, or have done it only a little. They don’t like the idea of hurting others BUT they say to themselves ‘Desperate times calls for desperate measures’  and they do end up carrying out their Revenge Plan.

And then they feel even more horrible. The big hole in the heart (or mind) remains gaping as ever. The gap is now widened by your conscience finally becoming more powerful and guilt takes over. (Sounds familiar, Kunal?) And then they do all sorts of other stuff. The lucky ones manage to forgive themselves. The others do not.

Anyways, that is one way to deal with pain. With more pain. Whether you give it to others (by means of Revenge) or to yourself (by depressing yourself more) is your choice.

Although I would like to add a small quote that popped into my head regarding this:
“A mind that plots and schemes is a mind that rots and screams.”

Two is the Sane.

They are called Sane because they are stable. They are mentally sound. They don’t have a beaming ego. And after all, hurt is what boosts your ego right? And without a huge ego, how can you get mad?

These Sanes use the best, most ideal method to deal with hurt: Move on.

Its funny how they can manage to forgive, forget and not look back on it. Hurt, small or big, leaves a long lasting impression on the mind’s flesh, yet these Gods mull over it like it was nothing. They cry for a day, let the pain take its toll, and then simply-well- MOVE ON! They don’t give a frick about Revenge, hurt or crying over the past. They just accept the way things are. They are the masters of emotions.

And then there is Three. The Pity-ers.

The Pity-ers is a clever breed of people who deal with hurt simply by PITYING. That is right. These are those confident ones, who go through hurt, pretend to ‘Pity the people’ who hurt you and then implode. Sometimes, it works. Often times it doesn’t.

They want to seem strong, and maybe they are but in most cases, it just a defense mechanism. First comes denial. They deny they are hurt, they nod and smile, they say ‘What a pity, but its their loss that they did that’ and then at the end of the day, they cry themselves to sleep. Although not the best way, this might be a fairly good way to deal with pain. Guess what? It is your choice. So if you chose this way to deal with the mental agony, be my guest…!

And then there are the last breed of Hurt-dealers called the Machines.

Those who are machines. Yes, some people are really well at keeping their emotions in check. They just switch that side of their brains off. They just continue to lead their lives as if nothing happens. How they do that, is a secret well kept amongst their masses. Maybe they are actually robots. Hmm, that IS interesting….

 

So which one are you? I will set up a poll. YOU tell me what way you like to deal with method. Do you fall in one of these categories or have one of your own? Don’t worry, it is all anonymous so no one will know your secret!

As always, if any of it made you smile, laugh, frown or giggle like a little baby, comment share and like! To be up-to-date with my other posts, give a like to my Facebook page and follow onTwitter if you use it! Any images used are either taken from Google Images or from my own personal collection, unless stated otherwise. Contact me if you want it removed.

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What is your take on Salman Khan’s recent arrest?

Hello, Bleedsters!
Exams are still in progress so I will drop by to ask you a small question, the answer to which I am desperately seeking. I don’t mean to spark controversy or a war, so be nice…

If you have anything to share or suggest, don’t let the comment section below remain empty! It desperately needs your attention 😀
Love,
Kunal

It has been 12 years since Salman Khan drove his car over the five men, who had been sleeping over the footpath and finally, we got a verdict! Salman Khan was sentenced to 5 years in Jail, before getting granted interim bail. But that is not the point of this post.

What I would love to know is, IS THIS RIGHT? I myself will not comment on whether granting bail to a person who killed 1 and injure four is correct ethically or otherwise, however I feel this is a strong point to discuss. And anyways, it has been so long since my last poll (which you guys liked) so I am trying a bit of controversiality (okay, I totally made that word up) in my posts!

I would like to present two major points though, one in favor and one against:

1) It HAS been 12 years and Salman Khan WAS drunk. And if you have ever been THAT drunk, you will know that you are never in control with so much of alcohol content in your body. Besides, the footpath is not a place to sleep (a weak point) and since then, he has apologized and done a lot of charity, humanitarian work!

2) However, driving while drunk is also against the law. AND on top of that, driving on a footpath is also very very illegal. And that too at night, with so much of alcohol in you? And is it really right if I kill someone and then do charity work, because last time I checked, doing something very bad and then doing something very good after that for someone else does not make the bad go away!

I will let YOU choose. Please do comment down below and tell me YOUR views!

Note that I have added a third option, ‘Other’ and if you tick it, you HAVE to give your view on it in the comment section below! 

Please leave a comment and share this post if it brought a smile, frown or laughter to your face! Most images are taken from Google.

The ATKT Deadlock

The ATKT Deadlock

By Kunal Nayak

Author’s Note:

Hey guys!

First of all, THANKS TO EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU! The last post (which was a poll) was absolutely kicked into gear by the readers and many of you voted sincerely! I am loving the support you guys are giving me!

I just wanted to know what your feelings are regarding the KT system in the Indian Education system. Of course, when I ask you for your opinion on this, I don’t mean to say “Do you like it?” cuz of course you will! It gives you a sense of security regarding your future right? HOWEVER, my question is straight to you: In a long term scenario, do you think it’s ideal to keep this KT system? 

Again, I am not at all biased towards the system since it has helped many of my friends in the past and besides, dropping a year sucks! So do give your comments, thoughts and views on this matter! 

Also, do comment about the post itself and vote in the poll. Let’s see how many vote in it!!

Lots of Love,

Kunal

Originally, this post was going to be ‘What is the reason behind ATKT?‘ but too many of my posts (like all two of them) are framed as a question so why not something different this time, right? And this is a very interesting realization I stumbled upon.

Before I go any further, let me first explain you what the hell an ATKT is, although most of the readers (including me!) will have had some experience in that matter!

Allowed to keep terms (ATKT)[1] is a process in the Indian education system to allow students of pre-graduation and graduation to study in next grade if they have failed 1 to 4 subjects. The students must pass the papers they failed before entering into to next grade. For example, if a first-year bachelor’s degree student fails to get passing marks in his four subjects, the student must pass those subjects before entering third year, while the student can study in second year.”-Wikipedia

This means that if you do fail in one to four subjects in any ONE of the semesters, you are allowed to be a part of the next semester whilst trying to pass in those subjects, or “clear the KT”, along with the new subjects! I know, it sounds a lot complicated. And trust me, it really is.

But my thought is very simple…but confusing: You perform less well, because you have the option of Keeping Term or KTs. You get KTs for performing less well. So then that means that because we have an assurance of not COMPLETELY failing the whole year and dropping it because of KT, we don’t take the exams as seriously as we should. However, if they remove the ATKT system because of this, students will no longer have a backup when they do fail and this will ruin their lives.

So then what do we do in such a situation? This, my fellow friends, is a classic example of a real-life deadlock!

I think we should focus on a solution to this. I mean, there must be SOME way to avoid destruction of Engineering student’s lives!!!

What do you guys think should be done? Should the ATKT system be removed and thrown away or still be kept?

Another poll, just for you guys 😛

It would be fantastic if you guys could give YOUR opinions down in the comments below! Its really simple and you can even post the comments anonymously! Also, this is a serious issue. We go through this horrible feeling of ‘getting a KT’ everyday and something must be done. But how do we do it? By removing  it or keeping it?

Edit:

So one of our readers gave a very insightful view on this subject:

The part where you said that ATKTs make people complacent about their exams could not make me agree more! But sometimes its not always that complacence but some sheer mistakes that lead to these KTs and then I got to asking myself this question : Is a little mistake is so badly punishable to waste a whole year and maybe leave a stigma for the rest of your future? And that made me say, NO, KTs should not be removed!” 

And I could not have agreed more! People don’t get KTs just out of laziness or just because (as I put it):

“[…]we don’t take the exams as seriously as we should.”

Sometimes, people genuinely find the exams difficult or have some other problems. In those scenarios, yes KT system should remain. But what about other cases? That is what I want to know from you guys! Do give me your views on that!

Please leave a comment and share this post if it brought a smile, frown or laughter to your face! Most images are taken from Google.